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Domestic
violence takes many forms, although it is usually a combination of
physical, sexual,
psychological, emotional and economic abuse that is used systematically
by the
abuser to control the person they are abusing. Domestic violence and abuse happens in lesbian
relationships as well as heterosexual relationships but statistically most abusers
are men. Lesbian women are not precluded from using refuge
services.
If your partner or ex partner does any of these things:
- Physically
hurts you or your children
- Sexually
abuses you or your children
- Verbally
abuses you or your children
- Threatens
you or your children
- Hurts,
or threatens to hurt, your pets
- Smashes
things in the house
- Isolates
you from your family and friends
- Wants
to control everything
- Blames you for the way he behaves
- Puts
you down, disrespects you and ridicules your
beliefs
- Says
that if you ever leave him he'll find you and kill you
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- Says
that if you ever leave him he'll kill himself and/or your children
- Says
you're an unfit mother and he'll have the children
taken into care
- Makes
you believe you're going mad
- Always
promises it won't happen again
- Denies
it ever happened in the first place
- Makes
you feel as though you can't do right for doing
wrong
- Tells
you what to do, what to wear, how to be
- Takes your money or denies you money for
food....
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...then you are living in an abusive
relationship.
There
are lots of other ways that abusers use to have power and control over
you.
They may not all happen all of the time, but they keep you 'walking on
eggshells'
because you never know when it's going to happen again.
Men
Welwyn Hatfield Women's Refuge recognises that men can experience
domestic violence too. If you are a male needing domestic violence
support services you can contact the Men's Advice
Line on (freephone) 0808 801 0327.
The line is open Monday to Friday from 10.00am to 1.00pm and 2.00pm to
5.00pm. You can leave a message if the line is closed or busy and they
will call you back. |
